Mea Maxima Culpa
I find myself in the unenviable position of owing a public apology. Several actually. Let's get to them:

1) To the guy outside the Home Depot I nearly beat to death with a dowel rod, I'm sorry. At the time I was under the impression you were a non-English speaking illegal alien with no access to legal recourse. I had no idea you were an American citizen. In my defense, you totally look foreign. While we're at it though, what the hell were you doing on the sidewalk near the Home Depot? Everyone knows that's where the illegals congregate looking for day-labor jobs. You know what, if anything you owe me an apology, you street-walking fake-illegal motherf...

Sorry. Please disregard that last part. As part of our court-sanctioned agreement, I offer a full public apology. Again, sorry. Hope that lacerated pancreas heals up nicely.

2) After I spent all my blogpost time and energy a few days ago bemoaning the downfall of George Lucas and his inability to tickle the hype-sensitive parts of my soul, Cartoon Network this week has resumed its Clone Wars series of cartoons filling in the story between Episode II and Episode III. The show is run by Genndy Tartakovsky, most famous for his Samurai Jack cartoon. Clone Wars is slick, funny, dark, fast-paced... it's easy to watch, which is more than I can say for the last two movies. The first series of cartoons (last year) were 2-3 minute long "episodes", which meant they had to eschew exposition for action and movement, meaning they were weird, impressionistic and incredibly sharp. All very compelling. This series comes in less dizzying 15-minute chunks.

So I offer my apology to George, but only partially. Clone Wars is total geek-out stuff that actually makes me want to see Episode III (which, I admit, I was going to do anyway). It's enough to wash the taste of stale dialogue out of your mouth left over from the films.

My one caveat to my apology: although it's obviously too late to do any good, I'd like to point out that Clone Wars works because George Lucas has nothing to do with it. I'm sure he has oversight of story, plot and characters for the purposes of licensing and synchronization with the larger mythology, but there is no Lucas taint to the flow of words, events or performances. I would say there was something to learn from this, but since there's nowhere left to go...

Just as a quick aside before I go, while unexpected sources are (temporarily) saving Star Wars, there are outsiders determined to destroy Star Trek. Go check out the home-made "missing episodes" (the last two years of the first "five year mission" NBC kept from us by cancelling the series) from the Original Series at New Voyages. Some dude playing Kirk in a bad Johnny Suede wig! Spock seemingly molded out of plastic (with acting to match)! Scotty's Scotland-by-way-of-Van-Nuys fade-in-fade-out accent!

Sometimes parody happens by accident.

Yes it's bad, but at least the site is really slow and there are lots of files to download.

The sets and special effects are nice, though.

I would also like to publicly apologize to my readership for this entire post. Just to be safe.


This post on the Narcissus Scale: 9.0


Pops
- posted by Pops @ 9:47 AM