Monday, February 13, 2006
Monday Lite: Sign Of The Beast
Horrible news for a large portion of our great, kick-ass nation what with all the record snow fall and all the resultant travel difficulties. I wish my fellow Americans continued health, safety and patience in these difficult times.

I also wish them to know the following: today in Riverside, CA = 86°. That's Celsius, bitches. We don't sweat, we sublimate. What I'm saying is it's warm.

It's February, so that means spring has arrived in SoCal. Last night I heard the frogs croaking their mating song outside for the first time. It was all I could do to resist. That's some sexy, sexy croaking. I don't know if all frogs have the same effect on me or if I just happen to have the Barry White of frog species native to the area around my house, but daaaaamn. I don't want to belabor this too much, but let me just say that not all our common amphibian DNA seems to be entirely vestigial. Some things are just primal and can't be un-learned entirely. It's the same way I always think of snakes whenever I'll eat a live mouse. There was only one pool of primordial ooze, people. It's our heritage. It's in the Bible. Look it up.

I would stay and develop this idea further (I have some arguably fascinating theories to rationalize my very natural tendency urinate on and around the places, objects and people who "belong" to me) but there's a new podcast of the Ricky Gervais show to listen to before my kids wake up. I'm not telling what I fed them to knock them out, just know that it isn't permanent...

...I don't think.

This post on the Narcissus Scale: 6.6



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