Wednesday, May 09, 2007
They Always Said Donald Was The Angry One
What does it take to outrage an American? Of course I can speak only for myself when I say that despite a 7 year effort to inspire me to action, the ravages of news cycle after news cycle, frankly, haven't really done much to get me out of my La-Z-Boy.

Controversial election in 2000, no WMDs, Katie Couric on the CBS Evening News... all egregious affronts to our national psyche and still, I can't even find patriotic arousal to fire of a sternly worded letter. Sure, they're all corrosive to my sense of self and my ability to feel happiness, but half a bottle of whatever's closest and I usually can't remember my name and everything's really funny.

You know what, though? Attack America all you want, Enemies of Freedom, but now I have to put my foot down. A country is one thing. But you don't assault the intellectual property rights of giant multinational diversified media conglomerates and get away with it.

I know by now you all must feel the same way having heard about the the dastardly tale of the Hamas Mickey Mouse.

I know things are rough in the Palestinian territories, but in the civilized world, we have something called copyright law. You don't just go infringing on it, willy nilly, and not expect to get (here) served with a cease and desist order or (there) probably invaded. It's a basic human freedom we take so seriously over here that we even allow corporations to propose, write and buy votes to secure passage of legislation protecting it. And if anyone knows anything about America, it's that we're only totally arbitrary about the things we think are the most important.

"You and I are laying the foundation for a world led by Islamists," Hamas Mickey tells kids. "We will return the Islamic community to its former greatness, and liberate Jerusalem, God willing, liberate Iraq, God willing, and liberate all the countries of the Muslims invaded by the murderers."

Ha, but nothing about the importance of eating vegetables, so the joke's on them. Let see them push out the crusaders and zionists without the cartoon-mandated nutrition we all enjoy.

As disheartening as this kind of an assault can be, this is not the first time a beloved character has been co-opted for less-than-savory ends.

We're all familiar with this bastardization, of course:

Slightly less well known is the neo-Nazi character Kermitler, the Wetlands Anti-Semite.

Or NAMBLA's insidious incarnation of Snuggles, the Narcoleptic Bottom

All of which pale in comparison to the most famous beloved children's character stolen for nefarious ends:

And to this day, memorabilia from Uncle Joe's Cartoon Collective is almost impossible to find.

Don't let them do it to Mickey, too. Rise up! Somebody, rise up! I'd volunteer, but I'm pretty sure Israel is going to get to those people first, for that reason or something else.

This post on the Narcissus Scale: 3.5




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